Tag Archives: dating

Three decisions

12 Apr

Good morning Beautiful people,

How is the new month treating you?

I am well, so much has been going on! Yesterday i read a friend’s blog and one post in particular caught my eye, she was talking about writing our autobiography and how we shouldn’t  wait till we are old and tired to write them but rather start now, every day, one post at a time.

Over the last couple of weeks i have been trying to sort my life out, not that i have a disorganized life but rather, just reevaluate my goals. But i have been praying mostly for guidance in a lot of things

I did my exams recently and i was asking God to help me pass and secondly if i should continue with the course i am doing. I applied for grad school and i have been put on a waiting list, i hope i shall be admitted and granted a scholarship. Either way i will be studying i just need God to open doors for me.

My company asked me to apply for a job opening in Uganda and the way things look i might be transferred  I do want to go home but not right now, i want to move to another country for another two years then i shall settle back home. the thing is the company the group wants to move me to has liquidity problems, i already asked God a long time ago not to employ me in companies that do not pay employees on time. I had a bad experience once, i had backlogs of salary of up to 6 months. So if the company can not pay me on time i am not interested in working for them.

Lastly, i met some one, (ok not really)  but i finally clicked with a Christian man! Gosh, it was such as beautiful moment to meet a man who not only loves God but we have so much in common, yet we are so different. We met about a year or so ago at a friend’s event and i never even looked at him twice. He was the skinny quiet guy in the corner. Then recently i found myself seated next to him on Sundays. Then on Easter we had a group lunch(us single people lol) and we hit it off. Since then we chat everyday. Then yesterday he told me he likes me! I didn’t know what to say because it was on whatsap!

Now i have a bone to pick with dating today, what happened to good old phone calls? Everyone seems to be using whatsap to date! I am very old fashioned and i would prefer to be asked out in person on a date or some thing.

So my dilemma is i might be moving country soon and i have no idea what to do about the man. It is has been very tough for me to click with a guy at this level that i have resorted to God(as always)to help me out.

I have been on a soul, Jazz and blues phase, i realized that i listen to music in a very systematic way. For example i will have a reggae and ragga phase, then worship 101, then world music then a Deitrick Haddon phase. The man in question found me in a soul, jazz and blues phase. poor him he can’t reconcile that i am such a dance hall fan! Any way lots of learning to do.

In other news my birthday is coming up soon and my Boss has already booked to take me to dinner, since he has resigned, he is giving me half of his library of books as a parting gift! I am super excited. The man in question is also looking for a plan for my birthday and i have no idea what i would want to do with him. All i want is to spend it with friends.

Have a great weekend


Is this love – Corinne Bailey Rae


Dates Woes

19 Oct

Today i read Myne’s blog , she talks about love and romance.

This took me back to a conversation i had with my girlfriend a few weeks ago.

You see, i am a poster child for failed relationships, so much that my longest relationship has been 10 months. That said, i am a hopeless romantic and very traditional in my thinking. It got me thinking, is there some thing wrong with me? I battled with this for so long, so i thought why not ask a friend who knows me so well and will not sugar coat any thing just to make me feel better about myself?

Conversations with Mrs Filipo are always insightful to say the least, if there is one friend i would not mind be stranded with in an island it would be her, she is very down to earth and practical(it helps that she is an architect, building a house will be easy 🙂 )

Towards the end of last year, i had decided to have sex, just for just, so that i could get rid of my virginity because i was tired of it! I tried so many times but failed, i just couldn’t do it.

A close male friend called me last week and for some reason we got in to the marriage topic, according to him, i (along with his sister) are a group of women seated on our holy high chairs thinking we deserve better(men) yet we don’t, what got me off was how we are not trying hard enough to date and constantly rejecting men! Mad is an understatement, it hit me, he is coming to the conclusion because of the conversations i have with him(poor dude) he does not even get 20% of what goes on in my life, ONLY the girl friends know the truth.

Any way, i thought some thing was wrong with me but my girlfriend made it clear that SEX is a big part of men and dating. But my last real relationship, i met a great man who was more than willing to wait and above all ready to marry me, i think in my mind, i believed and still believed that men can wait, if he can’t then he is not worth it.

My self esteem was hitting the lowest it has ever been, going on Facebook and seeing men who could have possibly been mine(surprising, they are dating women who look like me)  happy and i am single.

Until i meet some one who is on the same page, i shall wait.

Thank you love for letting me in on the secret, i know i can be so naive in some of the conversations 🙂 but i am learning slowly but surely and for standing with in on this difficult choice. For the last three years you have listened to me go on and on about a guy only for it to get cold and as we have grown, so has the conversation, we have matured so much,yet still in many ways young.

Have a great weekend

10 misconceptions

2 Apr

Yesterday i made two years in blogsville(and i am yet to get to 100 posts! eish, kyaba too hard). It was one of my girl friend’s birthday. Happy belated my sister from another mother, it took you to teach me the true value of girl friends and how many years i wasted not making enough of them. Today happens to be one of my long time girl friend’s birthday as well, Happy birthday Mrs B!

Over the weekend, i attended this really cool party and it hit me how lots of people totally don’t get who i am(not that i care) but it was funny. In no particular order the misconceptions

1. That i date only white men(this has to be one of top misconceptions). Last year after i cut my hair, one of my best friend’s mum commented on how we are alike, i later learnt she meant, our love for white men(sorry sweetie you are alone in this one). Another incident was at the party over the weekend, one of my white friends came to say hello and you should have seen the dude in my circle, hahahaha i burst out laughing and did not bother to set the record straight. Oh yes the biggest reason for this is because i play Ultimate. No i do not like white men, i like MEN! White, chocolate, caramel, dark chocolate, blue, yellow, orange, purple pink etc!!

2. I am boring(usually people i do not interact with socially). On various occasions people who meet me at a professional level think i am uptight and probably too strict lol(if only they knew). When we finally get to hang out they are in shock, that is how i got the name the mad Ugandan.

3. I am a tough cookie, yes i do think part of me is tough but those who know me really well know i am such a softie and romantic! and yes they use it to walk all over me. To be honest i am so afraid to fall in love because it might be my down fall……….. may be not!

4. I am well-traveled, i might have visited more countries than the average Ugandan but i am just getting started, i really do not consider my self as well traveled.

5. I am a snob(at all levels). I found this very funny but when asked a friend why he had thought so, he said i never acknowledged him when we passed each other on the street. Truth is, i am most likely absent-minded when walking, thinking up great ideas, thinking how i missed a wonderful photo opportunity, replaying conversations in my head(and analyzing them lol), so next time you find me, stand right in front of me or chances are i might not see you. When i had just started driving i found it hard( still do) have to work double to keep my focus on the road! It is worse that i drive like a maniac, 3 out of 5 times when i drive in this slow city, i get stopped by the ever efficient police(almost got arrested once).

6. I can’t cook to save my life. I always wonder why people come to such conclusions, today i got a text for one of my many suitors ‘Do you cook as well as you dress? ‘ not sure if it is a compliment to my style(which i think is pretty fabulous). But i consider myself a great cook, going by the return rate to my dinner parties :).

7. I am a party animal, this goes out to my friends, for some reason when i arrive at  a party it ‘catches fire’, so i always get invited to parties(who am i to say no?), i do love to party but i value my me time a lot more, i would rather hung out on my own and listen to some soul, jazz, blues, afro soul, soft rock, classical music.

8. I am very hard-working, yes i do work harder than the average person but truth is i am very, very lazy. I would rather sleep than write that report but since i know if i do not do it now it will affect my sleep time, i will do it really fast :).

9. I only choose cool people to be my friends. How is it possible to only have cool friends? I only have special friends, gifted in many ways. It does matter where you are from, what you do but where are you going? what are you doing to get there? If we get along, you are welcome to be my friend, there is always room for a new friend.

10. Last but not least, i drink like fish, smoke, do weed etc, i do not indulge any of the mentioned activities. water is my preferred poison(with lime and ice). I blame on my friends making me look like i am in the pombe clan.

So what are the most common misconceptions about you?

Happy new month! Especially all the April babies.

A special dedication to the April babies. Daddy Cool – Boney M.